We all need friends in our lives. Friends are there when you need social and emotional support. You feel less lonely and happier when your friends are around. It is scientifically proven that maintaining social connections can offer you a longer lifespan and lower your risk of mental health problems, like depression or anxiety.

However, not all friendships really bring you such benefits. Some are even downright toxic.

A toxic friend can drain you mentally. Some are manipulative, some put you down instead of lifting you up. But whatever it is, you don’t feel happy or yourself when you are with people like that.

The question is: how do you spot a toxic friendship so you know when to walk away? Here are 10 signs your friends may be toxic and you should reevaluate your relationship if they do.

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10 Telltale Signs Of A Toxic Friendship And When To Walk Out

1. They Only Call When They Want Something

Sure, being friends means that it should not bother you at all to do your friends favors. But if your friendship is based solely on them needing something from you and not on connection or mutuality, then there is certainly a problem.

All friendships should be equal. You should get as much as you give.

2.The Conversation Is Never Equal

It’s just so frustrating when all they can talk about is themselves. Surely, in a conversation, there is always a listener who would listen rather than speak. And you don’t might listen to your friend’s hour-long rant about their drama at work. But the moment you start sharing about yours, they lose interest and move on to another topic that, surprise surprise, revolves around them.

3.They Put You Down or Make Fun of You in Front of Others

Bad friends don’t care about how you feel. So it’s easy for them to find fault with you and put you down. It’s hardly ever okay for anybody to be mean to you constantly, but it’s worse when it’s one of your friends.

Whether it’s out of their disregard for your feelings or they’re just insecure about themselves, you don’t feel comfortable around them.

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4. They Are Aggressively Competitive

A little mutual motivation in the form of competitions between friends every once in a while isn’t necessarily a bad thing. But like most things – you can have too much of a good thing, especially with something that can so easily leave a sour taste in one’s mouth.

Worse yet, some of them try to one up you in everything, even in the bad things. You had a bad day? They have to have an even worse day. You got into an accident? They proceed to talk about that one time they almost died in traffic.

Definitely not something healthy for a true friendship.

5. They Aren’t Happy for You When Good Things Happen

Toxic friends rarely ever congratulate you on your achievements. It’s like nothing can impress them enough for a simple praise. This is actually a common behavior you often see in competitive people.

When something good happens to you, somehow they feel insecure, so they go out of their way to downplay your achievements. A true friend will want to see you succeed and be happy.

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6. They Bring Drama Into Your Life

It’s almost 2022, it’s time to leave the drama behind and stay positive. Well, but it seems like not everyone got that memo, certainly not this one friend of yours. Everywhere they go, drama follows. They always have to start an argument with someone or stir up drama out of nowhere.

Honestly, you don’t need that kind of negativity in your life. You don’t want to fuel their drama engine with encouragement as well.

7. They Exclude You From Things With Mutual Friends

Feeling left out is the worst. You can’t help but wonder why your friends are hanging out without you. Even if you’re an introvert and they just think you would have turned down anyway, it’s still nicer to be asked.

But maybe sometimes it’s unintentional, so try to talk about it first before you jump into conclusions.

8. They Don’t Respect You Nor Your Boundaries

Mutual respect is an important factor in any relationship. Sometimes friends can use their closeness with us as an excuse to cross the line and ignore our boundaries. Maybe they take your things without asking, or they drill you with private questions that are out of bounds for you.

It’s a telltale sign that they are not respecting your boundaries and are maybe even taking advantage of you. So beware with this type of friend.

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9. They’re Trying to Change You

New flash, friends can like different things! Sure, you need some common ground for compatibility, but you don’t necessarily have to make friends with someone exactly like you.

It’s really toxic when someone tries to change you to fit their personal standard. If your friend wants you to change the way you dress or talk, or make you do the things you dislike, it’s time to reevaluate the dynamics between you two.

10. They Gossip Regularly

Gossip is the wing to drama to fly. It creates misunderstandings and mistrust. If they talk behind someone’s back, it’s not hard to assume that they also do the same thing to you. Nothing breaks trust in a friendship faster than gossip, especially if it’s habitual.

It’s people like these that you can trust your secrets with. Nothing gives the gossipers more satisfaction than holding the secrets of others.

So try not to engage in gossip yourself and stay away from the friends that like to spread secrets around.

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